Saturday 8 May 2010

Little shoplifter in the making?


It's been an exceedingly long time since I posted an update on this blog.

So, in the interests of tackling this massive deficit in information management, I thought I'd better begin with a brief summation of what's being going on recently.

1. Ben is just getting over a bout of chickenpox, although the side-effects weren't as bad as I'd expected. The itchiness only seemed to bother him for one day and the calamine cream seemed to do the trick.

He's still got a few spots on his face and quite a few more elsewhere, but they're beginning to fade and disappear.

2. Ciaran, meanwhile, managed to avoid The Pox completely, and had his first birthday on the 28th April.

He has seven teeth now, an ever-expanding thatch and is a confident crawler, cruiser and climber. He's also becoming an active participant in the toy department of our house, taking on an increasing amount of managerial duties and delegating to his elder brother on a regular basis.

They do have fall-outs occasionally over the 'share' principle. Ben is told to share his toy with Ciaran but Ciaran doesn't always reciprocate.

But on the whole, they both play very happily together.

3. I've been beavering away in my new job in transport strategy, taking on an increasing amount of projects and going to meetings around the East of England fairly frequently.

4. And Ellen has been beavering away in her job too as well as taking on some extra work as a polling clerk at a local polling station in Bedfordshire for GE10.

Coming back to the kiddies though, it does please me to report that Daddy-Ben relations hit an all-time high this month.

Not only has he stopped going beserk when Mummy goes shopping without him, he actively seeks out Daddy time now in rooms in the house unoccupied by Mummy.

Today, he even went one step further. He wanted to go on a walk with Daddy - just Daddy.

We decided to walk to the shops as I'd run out of semi-skimmed milk and it was breakfast time. I got his coat on and we headed out at around 8.30am on the short, 10 minute stroll to Tescos.

When we arrived, Ben was browsing the shelves in no time.

It was becoming immediately apparent to me that all those trips to the shops with Mummy was rubbing off on Ben. He'd definitely picked up a lot of Mummy's shopping traits - like, just throw things in the trolley/basket and worry about the bill later.

Ben was loading up my basket like there was no tomorrow. I was browsing the yoghurts when all of a sudden, Ben threw in some spanish chorizo sausage meat and cheddar cheese. Cheese and chorizo were not on the shopping list. This repeated itself wherever I went.

More worryingly, Ben was also beginning to display some mild shoplifter tendencies.

On two occasions, he tried to make off with customer shopping trolleys full of goods, without the customers' permission. Daddy had to intervene on both occasions.

Then, as I was waiting at the checkout, he made a run for the exit before we'd paid.

Seriously. I was just about to pay when he walked off slowly before stopping about 10 feet away from me..."Ben, come back to Daddy please." (normal voice. No response)...slow walk becomes a run towards the exit and automatic doors fling open..."Ben! Come back here now!" (Extremely loud voice. Other shoppers look around. Daddy abandons shopping basket and sprints to exit to grab Ben).

I'm sure the CCTV department in Tesco were having a field day.

He did eventually return to the store, I did eventually pay for our goods and we left the store as all law-abiding customers should do - with a receipt in the bag.

It's just a matter of time before he slips a packet of sweeties in his back pocket surely.

How will I explain that to the security staff?

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